Universal Faucet Mounted Aquarium Filler (and Vacuum)

I have been shopping around on line for a faucet mount from the Python company for a few days and I haven't found anything that I trust to fit my weird sink connector. I need to do a major water change on my 55 gallon because I'm going to start using sand as a substrate and I screwed up and didn't wash it well enough before putting it into the tank. I decided to build this because apparently spiller pets in Tuscaloosa has closed forever and I'm tired of waiting for a solution to come my way. Also, I have a helpless god complex that only a 55-gallon aquarium full of loyal subjects can quell. Here's what  I came up with. This submission would also fit unfortunately well on ThereIFixedIt.

PROTIP: Make sure you have a water aerator on your sink. Half of the reason I went to home depot was because I broke ours off trying to get the threading when i was planning on buying a sink mount and  pissed off my girlfriend, causing her to look at me like this.

I've found that using the tube to fill your aquarium is a lot less obtrusive and stirs the sand far less than the 5-gallon-bucketeer method.

First of all, I went to big box last week and got a 20-foot nylon hose to replace the ~3 foot one my siphon came with. I definitely recommend this convenience regardless of whether or not you follow through with the rest of this instructible, as siphoning aquarium water directly into the street is far easier than into a bucket and then outside. This will be the first material. All part numbers are from Home Depot. It also bears mentioning that I bought a 3/8" barb x 3/8" barb coupler to connect the two pieces of vinyl tubing I have. That was 2 dollars.

- 1x 1/2" outer x 3/8" inner x 20' nylon tube, part # 42143620 (~$5.00)
- 1x  3/8" x 1/2" nylon hose barb to mip elbow, part # A-296 (~$3.00)
-  2x  1" hose clamp (~$.50 each)
-  1x trash 700c bike tube (free at your local bike shop)

Take your bicycle tube and find a spot that has no holes. The best way to check for holes in any tube is to partially inflate it and hold it under water. Once you have found a section, cut it out of the tube. Leave enough room for it to sheath the spigot's water softener and the threaded end of your nylon elbow. I left mine about 2 1/2" long because I wanted to make sure water was flowing at a safe rate and it allowed me to watch the tube expand. Now, wash the section of tube in soapy water and rinse it out, then let it dry. You want to clean out all of the talcum powder that coats its inside. Next, slide both of your hose clamps onto the bike tube. Put one end of the bike tube over the threaded end of the nylon elbow and move a pipe clamp over it. Tighten that down as far as you can to avoid leakage. Now, put the other end of the bike tube over the faucet, trying not to cringe at the image you have created in your head, replacing the tube with your own urethra, and move a pipe clamp over it as well. Tighten that down hard, but once it's tightened, don't screw with it too much or you might unscrew your water aerator or just break everything you just created.

I don't have any normal clamps, so I used my vice pliers to hold the nylon tube over the lip of the aquarium. Make sure you use something to secure it or you will flood your house and ruin your 400-dollar signed first edition of the entire 50 volume Encyclopaedia Aquatica, you helpless fish nerd. Now, waddle back into the kitchen and turn on the sink. Do it softly at first, because the tube is soft and will expand under the pressure. Once the water has been pushed over the lip of the aquarium, the pressure will be let off and you can crank the sink up to full capacity. She likes it nice and soft at first, but understands when its time to get the job done. Now, sit back, relax, and dream of how, in mere days, you will be breeding mollies and watching their spawn slowly die, knowing full well that you should put some salt in the tank, but chuckling at your new-found power while arguing to yourself that you aren't that lazy.